We plan, but sometimes our well laid out plans are foolishness to the ultimate Master Planner, God.
Today I got the greatest reminder of this old adage, and I had to take a step back and smile.
When I was planning my vacation and booking flights, I purposely planned it such that I would be in Kenya by the night of 30th December, so that I could drive down to the countryside on 31st in time to usher in the New Year with my mainest, Mama Carole, as has been tradition. I have always spent my holidays with mummy; just the two of us and New Year’s Eve has always been a day of thanksgiving and lots of prayer at home. You could say I’m a bit of a mummy’s girl 🙂
This year however, I felt the need to begin to slowly be my own person by doing my own thing and learning not to be too dependent on her strength. Therefore I compromised with myself; I would do me for Christmas and be home for New Year’s Eve Prayers, jet-lag or no jet-lag. Funny enough, Mummy was completely unbothered with how torn I was. “Go have fun with your friends. You deserve to be happy. You work too hard”, she said; leaving me wondering why she didn’t need me as much as I needed her; which is another story altogether, by the way.
Therefore, in the last 3 days when I developed tonsillitis and flu on top of terrible chest congestion issues that had plagued me throughout my entire vacation, I willfully battled with myself and pushed through almost 20 hours on a plane, sick as a dog, to get home late last night in time to drive to the village today. I was committed to seeing my plan through. I am not a quitter #smugface #muscles lol.
The biggest joke on me therefore, was this morning, when I woke up at 11:30am and could not even lift my head off the pillow. Everything hurt. Nose, head, throat, eyes, chest, fever, even my toe nails hurt lol. On top of that there were missed calls from Mummy, most likely to tell me not to leave Nairobi late as I’m used to. And I had no voice to even tell her how bad I was feeling. When we eventually spoke, mostly her, worried sick, prescribing medicine (She knows I have never in my 30 years gone to the hospital alone – yes I always have someone to take me coz I am terrified of hospitals) and re-assuring me to rest and not even contemplate driving the 2 hours home. (There she goes again, not needing me #rollseyes).
But the thing that hit me most, and which I guess has inspired this post, is the sheer amount of love I have around me. I had friends asking me what they could do and suggesting they take to hospital or bring meds. The best of all, my best friend, who as fate would have it is hundreds of Miles away in Eldoret, somehow organized with one of her friends to deliver medicine to my house. I must not get out to look for dawa, she said. #happytears. She also tried to find someone to drive me to Nyeri, coz she understands how much I do not want to be alone on New Year’s Eve. And even though that did not work out, that is still the sweetest, most heart-warming gesture. I haven’t been that humbled in a long while. I really do feel amazing and abundantly blessed.
To cut this long story short, as I grow older, I now realize what truly matters in life. I no longer count my blessings by material things or possessions. I count my blessings in terms of the people and moments that truly take my breath away and etch themselves into my heart and mind permanently. In this respect, I am well and truly blessed
I also realize that, I cannot pick and choose when to be independent and when to get my strength from mum. I must learn to carve out my own path ad especially where it concerns my spiritual life. This morning, one of my biggest concerns was how I would live if I didn’t start my 2015 with our usual 31st prayers at home. Yet now I know, that she thought well ahead about this day and fully equipped me with all it takes to go before God and present my supplications and prayers to Him for my future and believe that He will do it for me. So this tonight I will go before God, commune with Him, let His peace and love fill me; and commit my 2015 to His able Hands.
Finally, as I celebrate this day in the comfort of my bed, I really do know that I have the greatest treasure of all – LOVE. And I want to celebrate the people in my inner circle who so generously and tirelessly give it to me – this has to be my greatest lesson of 2014. I feel so special and I hope to be half the friend that you guys are to me. God is Love, I see Him reflected in you every single day.
Happy New Year!!!!!