Marriage, what it is or isn’t…….

10 Dec

So Friday is the day I breeze into the office at the very early hour of 9am clad in my definition of smart casual (which I think should be clearly defined by the way judging by the night dresses evening gowns, track suits, muscle shirts, exposed belly buttons and such like unseemly things I tend to see on casual friday), water bottle in had, open my outlook official mail, open google talk to chat my man, simultaneously open facebook, you tube and a blog of my choice and tirelessly work you-tube deejay and browse the day away till about 3pm when I very professionally leave for a client sales visit. Don’t judge, you know you do it too, yes you and you.

My journey into blogville today led me to this very eye-opening and devastatingly honest article by Mrembo here which was in response to an article written by the very humourous Raymond Chepkwony here

I am definately not the wedding show crazy type, but neither can I claim to be a die hard, no-nonsense, dont-need-any-man feminist. As a matter of fact I find them extremely tiring to listen to. I love being in love. I love love lol. Am your average, mushy, romantic with no apologies. I experience so much joy being with Peanut, I can’t imagine living any other way. Even when I was single, I still believed in love and marriage and living happily ever after. Clearly all those Mills & Boons I read did the trick.

Over the past few weeks I have given the big M-word quite a lot thought following the recent turn of events in my life. I’ll be quick to admit that my focus on marriage is a very recent thing and most of my friends would actually not believe am even contemplating it; I think I give off an independent-no-nosense woman vibe. But more and and more I am starting to warm up to the idea and just sought out to get different views from random peopple.  Unfortunately almost everyone I have talked to has managed to scare the daylights out of me and build on my already very present scepticism. Most of the people I’ve talked to have all been married under 5 years so it’s not the least bit funny when the bigger D-word actually comes out of their mouths. The experiences some of my friends have gone through I cant even begin to describe. Both men and women by the way

This little piece I found lawdknowswhere – and which all my married friends swore was the truth and nothing but the truth –  did not help matters either:

Love and Marriage

Love is holding hands in the street.
Marriage is holding arguments in the street.

Love is cuddling on a sofa.
Marriage is one of them sleeping on a sofa.

Love is talking about having children.
Marriage is talking about getting away from children.

Love is going to bed early.
Marriage is going to sleep early.

Love is losing your appetite.
Marriage is losing your figure.

Love is sweet nothing in the ear.
Marriage is sweet nothing in the bank.

Tv has no place in love.
Marriage is a fight for remote control.

Love is 1 drink and 2 straws.
Marriage is “Don’t you think you’ve had enough!”.

“Love is blind,
Marriage is an eye opener!”

Though Mrembo shine a ray of hope, albeit a faint one, I still can’t help but wonder; are there any happy couples who have been happily married for over 5 years that you know? And I mean honestly, truely happy?

In unrelated news, I had dinner guests at my house yesterday, my boss, his wife and two kids who are visiting from Kenya. Dinner went beautifully and I was happy to have some activity in my otherwise very quiet apartment. Problem is, as usual I overcalculated (or maybe got a  little too eager to show off my culinary skills) and now find myself with a fridge full of alteast 5 different kinds of leftovers. Aaarrgh!!! Who the eff is supposed to eat all this food? Till when? Peanut thinks its a good thing coz now I’ll be forced to eat more often. Nkt!!

Back to youtube and facebook. Have a lovely weekend lovelies!!! Drive safe


not-so-little Miss Random!!


8 Responses to “Marriage, what it is or isn’t…….”

  1. Zippy December 18, 2010 at 10:00 am #

    Marriage is hardwork, but worth a short… thank you mrembo and miss random for giving me reasons to want to give it a shot!

    Blessed weekend.

  2. Olivia December 14, 2010 at 10:46 am #

    Lol! Guilty on browsing the day away. I do manage to get the necessary work done though, so that makes it a win-win situation. As regards marriage, one actually two, heck…make that three…PURE HARD WORK. I love Mrembo’s article. It puts things in perspective. I have been married for a year now and I can tell you it’s not easy. I had a baby and got married all in one year. So you can imagine the amount of adjusting I had to do. This is my two cents worth on marriage…communicate, communicate, communicate. That’s what it all boils down to, in my opinion. Great marriages don’t fall down from heaven like manna, you gatta work it out. Long story short, all is not lost. Marriages do work, at least mine is :).

    • not-so-little Miss Random! December 14, 2010 at 10:56 am #

      Olive, now I have 2 reasons to be hopeful, you and Mrembo. I think the realization that marriage is hard work and the conscious effort to always work at it is what makes marriage a success. And I do know you and your hubby and your love really inspires me. You two are too cute together and I know 40 years from now I will still look up to you. xoxo

  3. not-so-little Miss Random! December 10, 2010 at 7:32 pm #

    Raymond what do you mean? Convenient in the sense that they get an in-house laundry and catering service? Convenient in that the ring on their fingers acts as a female magnet? Or is that just what society has turned marriage into?

  4. raymondchepkwony December 10, 2010 at 5:51 pm #

    Marriage is convenient for men! were it not for society

  5. not-so-little Miss Random! December 10, 2010 at 5:02 pm #


    You actually did help. I’ll do my best not to shy away from the work when the time comes. In unrelated matters, why did you stop writting? I really enjoyed your blog though I only discovered in recently. Still enjoying back articles actually

    Pray for a good one for both of us. Bisous!

  6. Mrembo December 10, 2010 at 4:52 pm #

    Glad I was able to be that small little fading beacon of hope when it comes to marriage.

    I will reiterate it yet again.. marriage is hard work which one has to work at deligently.

    And when you have a good one it is the best deal ever… hands down!

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