25 Dec

8:59am: There’s an annoying song playing somewhere in my house. Nkt! Will someone shut that thing up already? Oh wait a minute, am not at my house, am at mum’s millions of miles from Civilization. Infact I might be in Somalia. I exxaggerate, but it sure feels like it. A sleepy glance to my left reveals mum’s phone shrieking away as it charges a few steps away. I yell for her to make it stop but alas, I am alone.

9:15am: Let’s check what my people on facebook, the 7th and largest planet are up to. Merry Christmas, merry Christmas and more merry Xmass. Nothing new there. 8 new text messages on the crack berry, a few more on the E71. Merry Christmas, merry Christmas and more merry Xmass. <sigh>

10:ooam: I really am alone huh? Gramps Morgan’s “One in a million” plays in the background. Its my phone. Which one of my hangovered friends is calling? Oops, I do not know this number. Turns out its mum checking in to say she went to the children’s home first as sh figured I would sleep till 11am or so. I cannot recall the last time I slept till 11am, hangdown or not. So 2000 and late!! Time to see whats for breakfast. There’s little that I can eat wihout making an effort which I am absolutely not upto. Am on holiday afterall and still on “mgeni siku ya kwanza” mode. Let me have some cookies and juice before this woman comes to make proper breakfast for her hungry and very lazy offspring

10:39am finds me outside chatting up the neighbours kids who are decked in all their Christmas finery. The little boy has painted the front of his new, heavily-starched beige suit with fanta orange to the dismay of his mother. Kids will be kids. In the spirit of Christmas I share my cookies with them. Abdullahi, a two year old future heart breaker totally refuses my cookies, his mummy has tought him well I guess. Mum appears looking flustered and full of apologies then promptly leaves again for “only 10 minutes to go share some goodies with the female prisoners. There are only 3 of them this year and she has a bond with all three. I love her. She reappears a few minutes later and before I can sulk some more I have some tea, oranges, sausages and “toast mayai”, a delicacy I have not indulged in in ages. Moms!! She’s the best

12:00am flip through the channels which are all sickeningly Christmassy. Double nkt!! I land on a similar themed movie about a lady who gets engaged to and eventually marries Santa. You heard me right, Santaeffingclaus! I painfully watch till the cliche happily ever after ending. Mum insists I take a shower as if I am 8 again and I indulge her after which she regales me with all the stories and goss she’s been keeping for all these months. I happily play along ooh’ing and aah’ing, nodding and laughing at all the appropriate places.

1pm: Bossman calls asking for a proposal that is due early monday morning. The black berry refuses to co-operate totally. Where is the Christmas love? Triple nkt. I hate this. I try everything, switching it on and off, even hitting the damn thing, it just wont work! Wish I had a copy in my gmail, why didn’t I think to cc my gmail? Nktest.

2pm finds me in a cab driving around this dusty little “mwisho wa reli” town looking for a cyber. Just when am about to give up I see, “havad cyber cafe” and I have never been more grateful. I was not aware Harvard had a branch here, well, every day is an opportunity to learn something new I guess. This great establishment is ran by the very stylish and heavily perfumed, Moha, an ardent Arsenal fan from the shirt he’s wearing. He is happy to have a Nairobian grace his kingdom and am ushered to the best computer which promptly fails and I have to move to his control hub which is the only one that seems to work.

15minutes later elec goes off. Oh the frustration. Moha tells me not to leave, “tumezoea zitarudi tu saa hii. Utakunywa soda gani?”. I politely decline but remain seated and true to his word 5 minutes later the lights are back. I resume my typing as he peeps nearby. Another 15minutes and the lights disappear again. Dont they sell UPSs here? Nktest!! Imediately I call my cab the elec returns and once again Moha offers me soda. I think about it twice but I dont want to create a certain impression. Am not that kind of girl πŸ˜‰

3:54pm and my proposal is done. My tummy is growling too, mum’s chapatis are calling and this is no way to spend Christmas even for a grouch like me. Time to salvage what little is left of it.

Merry Christmas people and if you are anywhere near “mwisho wa reli” holla at a girl.


Not-so-little Miss Random!!


One Response to “Overated”


  1. Beat! Uninspired!! « randomcarole - February 22, 2011

    […] was a rumour. Don’t even mention sitting in a cramped cyber cafe with snail-pace internet, after my experience in Isiolo I sareed that one. Being the slow person that I am, I haven’t figured out how to blog on the […]

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